Get To Work America!

Like everyone in America, I love the NCAA Tournament. It distracts me from my issues. Currently, I have a small problems with “mouses”. (I prefer “mouses” as opposed to mice.) I sometimes wonder how it is that I have been reduced to this. I have a good education, a job that requires lots of thought & consideration. People solicit my opinion. Yet the focus- the climax if you will- of my daily existence right now is how I’m doing in this pitched battle I am fighting with the stupid mice that live behind my stupid oven that I cannot move because of the stupid gas line.

I’m like the Pol Pot of Mouseland. I dispense no justice, only death on a sort of whimsical, arbitrary basis. Do I set the trap by the refrigerator or the glass pasta bowl? To me it doesn’t matter- but to the mouses.....

My neighbors have pets- and they leave pet food out all day. They are two typically New York gay men- always out, owning the sort of pointless yappy dog that must be penned lest she chew up everything in the house. I’m sure that is what attracts the mouses- the never ending free meal, eaten while staring at the actual pet, that is caged up all day. Every so often, the dog spazzes- and I’m sure it is because she can see mice eating her food- and she can’t get at them.

This year, I am pulling for Bucknell. I love the Bison because they have stolen the Buffalo Bills logo- which candidly, isn’t really even a good one:

http://sports.yahoo.com/ncaab/teams/bau/schedule

Like a high school team! You know… every high school conference in the country has a "Patriots"- or in my case a "Colonials"- that rips off an NFL logo.

http://www.colonialsd.org/pwhs/cwp/view.asp?a=782&q=428984

Anyway, the guys at the Wheelhouse do a better job than I ever will be providing in-game commentary- so check out “the comments’ section” there.